Asher Jay
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JAY JOTS

Studio updates and Field Notes

The Code Between the Sexes

Blossom by Asher Jay

Blossom by Asher Jay

Then I stumbled on this marvelous idea of doing my book as a series of conversations, like quick stand up comedy skits, but tragically I didn’t have the energy to transcribe all the exchanges, which left me with what you see below, which is around when I capped off Attempt 5.

Deciphering the Code:
The Cast:

THE LEADING LADIES:
XX: Me in all my politically incorrect glory.
XX-1: an anonymous reference that references all my XX chromosome friends.

THE MEN IN OUR LIVES:
Ex-XY: Past Misgivings and miscreants
F-XY: Pending problems and prospects
P-XY: Current crisis and consolation
CISS-XY: Clandestine Intermittently Sexual Shenanigans

Live Dialogue, Revealed without much Regard for all Variables Involved:

XX: A bird in the hand maybe worth two in the bush, but a bush in your hand is hard experience.

XX-1: He broke up with me again Ash!
XX: What do you see in him XX-1, he isn’t even particularly hot, and I'm sorry to say this, but you could certainly do better!
XX-1: It’s not about his looks Ash, I like him for his personality.
XX: But girl, it’s his personality that keeps dumping you!

F-XY: tell me something I don’t know about your body yet…
XX: Hmmmm I tend to go up a cup-size before my period.
F-XY: Perhaps we should reschedule our date for that time of the month.

XX: After my fifth Martini even a lamp post can get me all hot and bothered.
F-XY: By the looks of it I’m guessing you’ve had your fifth Martini…


XX-1: I am down with a viral fever, I don’t feel so good.
XX: How on earth did you contract a viral fever now?
XX-1: It’s XY, he was under the weather and well, I guess he got too close.
XX: Well XY is like an open sewer, you never get too close to something with communicable diseases!

XX: Here’s a g'nite kiss. Use it well and plant it right.
CISS-XY: Oh that kiss did some naughty before it put me to rest. It’s only fair I subject you to the same. A kiss for every erogenous zone on your body my lady.


XX: What do I always say?
XX1: Sigh...
“If what you want is in what you say then what you get is most fitting
But if what you want isn’t in your say then you’ll be left regretting.”
XX: Precisely! It’s good that I had you memorize my brilliance.

XX: You don’t like giving head?
XX1: Sigh... I hear it gives you penis breath, which sounds more off putting than halitosis.
XX: If the jingle told the truth it would go, ‘always, always a bridesmaid until you open wide.’

But then I got tired of this format of writing. I think my main hiccup is sustaining a singular voice, I am basically a biennial art show or a collection of shorts from different authors in one person. I can’t do the same thing twice, (that’s what he said) and I outgrow styles far too quickly for my own good. I need a book that will evolve with me yet not read like a personality disorder. How does one ever write a book with a singular voice? Maybe if I were more dull and less all over the map in my interests I’d be able to champion such a cohesive effort? Heaven help me!

Asher Jay